Hello LIPTalk Nation, this week has been super fantastic!! The number of plays for the podcast keep rising and the response keeps growing. I love living my passion. For far too long I lived to please others. Can you relate? I’m telling you, some of the best advice to help me stop this was “It’s none of my business what people think of me.” This advice has really helped me develop some thick skin. In fact, this blog post is all about FOUR of the triggers that I had to stay away from so I can conquer my depression and anxiety.
Let’s Define triggers… or should I say, emotional triggers:
Emotional Triggers….is a response to a person, situation, event, dialogue, reading, film or other content providing entity, that provokes a strong emotional reaction. Often were are not self aware when were are triggered, and fall into reacting prior to sifting through our strong emotional response. By the way I got this definition from Be the Change Consulting… There are the four triggers that I had to stay away from and wanted to share them with you. Maybe you already know what you should stay away from…. but my hope is to suggest alternatives to these triggers so that you can begin your journey of conquering the negative thoughts of “I can’t” to positive thoughts of “I can”. I’m “not worthy” to “I am worthy” and from “I’m not good enough” to “I am good enough”.
The reason why I think it is important to recognize your emotional triggers is so that you can begin your road to a more successful life.
Many of you may already know my background and of depression and being a Victim and now survivor of a child hood tragedy ( I was molested) in case this is the first time you are hearing this…. at an early age I began feeding lies to myself about self worth and body image… which had a domino effect emotionally and physically. In my early twenties I suffered from a form of bulimia which had huge effects on my body, then and now. It was just this year that I learned how to forgive myself and my TMJ began to go away. (It was to the point that my jaws were locking pretty much every time I chewed or even sang.) I’ve conquered many physical ailments by recognizing my emotional triggers. Things that make me cry or get angry…. and I want to share them with you.
LIPTalk Nation, I’ve said this before and I will say it again, it is my belief that anyone suffering from depression and anxiety is highly intelligent and feeding the wrong information to their brain. I have spent the last two years reviewing this theory and developing a method to help myself and people of the like to conquer mental illness. I believe, with any action step to improve first starts with deciding to want to get better and to want to change. I hope that I have been able to simplify the information so that you all can understand the importance of recognizing emotional triggers and staying away from them.Okay, this may not be new information, but maybe a great reminder for some of you…..
The Four Triggers that I needed to avoid to conquer my depression and anxiety.
1. I had to stop watching the news and political debates.
Now this includes listening to them as well. I realized that there was no benefit to me feeding my brain this information. There was No resolution and I would dwell on all the negative things happening on my community and in the world. There is a domino effect that happens when you begin to have negative thoughts. First you think it, then you feel it, then you become it or act upon it. Which drips down on your friends and family. Including your children.
There is actually a sad hormone called prolactin; which more women tend to have more of this in their bodies than men. Go figure right. Well, there is a reason for it. Women are nurturers.
There is actually a sad hormone called prolactin…
…the “feel good” hormone which is oxytocin.
We were created to feel things and to empathize and sympathize. Feelings are a gift. We need to learn how to use them, not dwell on them. Men, I’m talking to you as well. None of us are prone from being depressed. Yes, it is a real thing. So, what did I do instead of watching the news or political debates? Well, I did some research and found that I could look at my favorite baby animal or watch a video of my favorite baby animal and my body would automatically produce the “feel good” hormone which is oxytocin. And Yes, it was a simple as that. But with any kind of change or new habit you must first DECIDE to do it. Easy to do. Easy not to do. I wanted to “FEEL” better so I did. AND…. by the way, looking at pictures of your favorite baby animal also help you practice your WILL power. Awesome right? But we will talk about will power on a different episode, right now I want you all to understand triggers to avoid while depressed or feeling anxiety. So the first trigger that I needed to avoid was I had to stop watching the news or political debates.
2. I had to stop watching Sad, Sappy, and Scary movies.
(Did you notice they all started with an S?) That made it easy for me to remember. So if the movie made me feel sad or even angry I knew I needed to avoid them. Remember, we don’t want to produce the “sad hormone” prolactin. The same goes for watching these kind of movies as watching the news or political debates. This adds no benefit to your thoughts or feelings while depressed or suffering from anxiety. I want to put a caveat here by saying I’m not saying I’m against any of these or saying they are bad. I clearly want to articulate what I had to stay away from to conquer my depression. I am saying these were my triggers and possibly yours too. Instead of watching these types of movies, Sad, Sappy or Scary, I watched funny movies. Movies that made me laugh. Laughing produces the “feel good” hormone, oxytocin which then caused me to be in an I’m feeling good mood and so it started dripping on my friends and family. I think you see my point here. Easy to do, easy not to do. Did I want to feel better? Yes, I did. So again, I had to choose not to watch Sad, Sappy or Scary movies. I had to realize what kind of information I was allowing myself to see. I don’t like feeling sad or angry. So this was a trigger for me. I have to stay away from them. Do you need to do the same?
3. I had to stop listening to sad and even slow music.
Now I’m sure I will get lots of debate on this one, but again, this was a trigger for me. And I think you know where I’m going with this one. I typically am a fast paced person. I like being busy. Having five jobs isn’t a big deal for me, all the while chasing my kids around the house. I have High energy, but while I was depressed, I didn’t even want to get out of my pj’s, chase my kids or even take a shower, so listening to this type of music produced that “sad hormone” prolactin… AND I really don’t like crying a lot, so I chose to avoid listening to this kind of music. Okay, Another caveat, I’m a musician. I enjoy a variety of styles of music. I am part of the worship team at my church, which often times the music can be slow and convicting. Now that I conquered depression this type of music is no longer a trigger. I wanted to make sure I said this. Well, slow music is still sometimes a trigger for me, because I’m a high energy person. But what I did to replace sad and even slow music for a while was to listen to music that made me feel happy; which includes music full of God’s promises. Which can me a form of affirmations. Which also produces once again, that “feel good” hormone, oxytocin. Often times, people will tell me their favorite movie, song or ask about me about the news, when I know they are suffering with depression or anxiety. Their favorite song or movie would clearly be about something sad… and the news…. well I think you know where I’m going with this one… but I sometimes ask them why they like that song or movie, and their answer is because it made me cry….. But what they don’t realize is that negativity is an addiction. If you are depressed, you automatically find the negative in things. LIPTalk Nation, You’ve got to know your triggers. IF you are sad, than it is a must to stay away from sad things. This includes every aspect of your life. If you want to conquer the negative talk in your head, you need to feed your brain with positive information. So, not only did I have to stop watching the news and or political debates, sad, sappy and scary movies, and stop listening to sad and slow music, But also I needed to stop Complaining. Which is the fourth trigger.
4. I needed to avoid complaining.
I really had to take a step back and reflect about what was coming out of my mouth. I found myself complain about aches and pains. The weather. The kids. My circumstances…. Well, I was complaining too much. I realized it had a domino effect. My kids, husband and family was picking up on it. I was addicted to complaining. LIPTalk Nation, are you addicted to complaining?? It’s a difficult thing to stop. Complaining produces yet again that sad hormone, prolactin which causes you to cry and feel heavy burden. I hope I’m painting a clear picture for you. So, to stop this complaining addiction, I had to practice that grateful heart exercise that you may have heard me mention in a previous episode. I had to place what i was thankful for around my heart. God, my husband… family, sugar cookies and this time of year Christmas… This one is easy not to do. But very easy to do. That very thing of being thankful produces oxytocin, the FEEL GOOD hormone and you automatically begin to FEEL better. Even my aches and pains. Now I’m not saying that I Don’t ever Complain. But what I’m saying is I started a new habit when I want to complain. Because How many of us can really change our circumstances?? It’s all about perspective. One of my favorite quotes, by Jim Rohn, “Don’t wish it were easier, wish you were better; Don’t wish it were easier, pray for more skills.” I have really taken this to heart. So, I started with being thankful. Scripture says, the Joy of the Lord is my strength. How do we be joyful, start giving thanks. I started telling people what I was thankful for instead of complaining. I looked for the positive in the conversation instead of the negative. You have to be intentional with your thoughts and words. Complaining was definitely a trigger for me. It was imperative for me to stop watching the news, political debates, sad, sappy and scary movies; stop listening to slow and sad music ( for a while) and once again stop complaining. So, maybe these are your triggers too.
Ask yourself …. WHAT ARE MY TRIGGERS???
Ask yourself LIPtalk Nation…. WHAT ARE MY TRIGGERS??? Maybe you are finding yourself crying over commercials, or even driving in heavy traffic is a trigger for you… do you have road rage??? Start reflecting on what makes you cry or angry…. If you want to conquer depression and anxiety, I believe you need to recognize what makes you sad in the first place. I STRONGLY believe that you are highly intelligent and if you are suffering from depression and anxiety you are feeding the wrong information to your mind. In many cases, you are lying to yourself. THIS IS NOT OKAY!!!! I believe in you. If you are needing help and are ready to take action, reach out to me at liptalknation.com and book a 15 minute phone call so we can begin the journey of healing together.
Listen to my episode here!
Let me know your thoughts. Looking forward to hearing how you are living your LIFE IN PURPLE. What you say is what you become.
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